The Phamily Times

It’s hard to believe it’s been two years since the stork brought The Boy to our doorstep. But it’s on his birth certificate and everything and since his birth certificate appears to be real and isn’t from some country of dubious birth certificates like Dominican Republic or somewhere else, I guess he really is two today. Happy Birthday Big B!

Do you ever spend your nights thrashing about to some killer riffs then wonder why you wake up with a pounding headache? Protect yourself, man. Safety first, man. Go on, bang your head. After all, metal health will drive you mad. But eardrums are like little diamonds in your ear. They’re rare and nearly irreplaceable.

This Public Service Announcement has been sponsored by Miroki and Phriends. Glad to be of service. Theme music at the bottom sponsored by Quiet Riot and The Sword. BANG YOUR HEAD!